CLITORIS

For those in the know the clitoris whereabouts, yet aware of its yielded sexual response, might as well call it the jewel of sexual indulgence and who knows perhaps, of a hidden treasure. Diamonds are nowhere near the exquisite jewel that the woman bears on her figure, the clitoris. The best approach to establish its location is by probing. Also visual approach could be staged, for all it takes is a mirror and a good sight. You will come across with a subtle lump where the big lips outline a v-shape like, up in the vagina. About pea size although covered only the outer side, which lies partially embedded in such an inconspicuous hood. Upon touching such tip, ya woman will derive some thrilling sensation. But even touching takes heed and time however. Likewise the penis made of erectile tissue although unequal shape wise. Therein a nerve pathway lies embedded, splinted in two elongated parts. Directly linked into the pelvic area. Upon sexual arousal, foreplay, bloodstream starts being pumped up into your clitoris, leading the vagina into natural moistening. Meanwhile, the whole genital surroundings would gorge with ongoing blood, becoming rather sensitive. The sexual pearl, gets gorged with blood, likely to turn itself pinkish or even darker, whilst its ducts get hardened on altogether. In which point, the muscles and connective tissue gear into a paced throb motion. What becomes relevant to the partner’s acknowledgement is how delicate a sexual organ the clitoris is. So therefore its property of inducing sexual pleasure, might, if inadequately or else bluntly approached, trigger much pain and distress. In order to keep it at bay, as discomforting to the receiver as to the giver, few hints could be given, Explaining that despite being considered the female penis, it mustn’t be approached as such. Encourage the partner onto exploring the genital surroundings, prior to strike the magic button, yet rather smoothly. In a nutshell, make sure your partner does not forget to be creative at the foreplay and show consistency anyhow until the end. What is it for? Because creativity first hand works out by gearing the sexual department up, in that changing pace and intensity on the probing approach. So far, tell the partner to come out as repetitive as predictable since you’d be about to cum then. That is what clitoral orgasm is about. Oral sex provides moist, warmth and sooth under the right measure for the clitoral indulgence. More often than not penetration leaves the clitoris a lot to desire; in addition the tongue teases the lips nearby promoting even more satisfaction Tip; insert the tongue well inside the vagina and work all the way up, unhurriedly. Let it be known what it feels like. It is very important as he would be made aware as to whether it feels right or otherwise. Orgasm stands for sexual climax, which could be stricken upon sexual-affective sprees.Is needed a lot of arousal for a woman reached orgasm. In being an external sexual organ and easy to rub on, there’d play major role in the sexual indulgence purposes. The pleasure irradiated from it onto the vagina, might orgasm be ensued. Every orgasm means essential. Its localization does not grant itself the prize that tells which is better or worst. Vaginal orgasm becomes easier to reach when the woman straddled on top of the man. In what enabled her better range of motion to get cracking on that clit up against his crouch, therefore geared up quickly. Each woman is unique, so is each orgasm. Its shape does not vary a great deal, given the female physique being so alike in its framework. You woman, should tread and unravel the way that could lead you into bliss on your own. And there are many avenues into delight or arousal to the woman. So too meant important to acknowledge what gives you pleasure the most and share it with your partner. Much as bringing all out that displeases and/or distresses you. The clitoris is a treasure, well-concealed, unveil and bring it forward to your partner, surely he’d love it even more about yourself.

Kisses,

Jesse~

Your guide to sex games

Sex repertoire in a long term relationships often becomes routine when many sex positions are already learned and sequence of sexual techniques is followed without considerable changes. However, sex can be an exciting every time even if you won't invent a wheel.

How to prepare for sex games

Whisper your secret desires
Power of imagination can be so strong that you can make your partner urging for you using your words only. You can talk out all your sex scenario and whisper them into your lover's ears to make him or her anticipate your next step with impatience.
Set the rules
Who said that spontaneity is a key to great sex? One of the most effective ways to make a night is to think over a sex scene and follow it according to certain rules.
For example, your partner ties you up and you act as if you are trying to avoid the restraint. You can encourage your partner's actions by asking him to set you free. And you set a safe word beforehand to signal when you really want to stop the game, both of you can enjoy it safely.
Leave him a note
When you anticipate a date, leave a note to your partner writing down what you are going to do during the erotic encounter. This can be a one note or series of notes that you can leave in the course of the day. Your partner will be excited long before you even touch him.
Sex games ideas:
Agree on pleasing your partner, following all his or her orders.
Give each other a special treat and change the roles for giver and receiver.
Role playing often leaves a plenty room for imagination. Let yourself play a role of an innocent girl and your man can be a seductive lover or otherwise he is unexperienced and a woman is a mature skilled woman.
Arrange the rules of behavior for your partner and “punish him or her” if he break the rules. This could be slight erotic spanking or any other sexy punishment.
Blindfold your partner – this will add a feeling of both insecurity, pleasant anticipation and surprise.
Food play is one of the favorite tasty treat you can give your partner. Placing bars of chocolate or applying whipped cream over the body of your lover and then licking it off can be unforgettable.
Of course you can invent something absolutely curious that both of you will enjoy – this makes two partners closer and your sex life variegated. keep in mind that most sexual organ is your brain and your imagination can turn every sexual encounter into amazing and unique experience.

Kisses,

Jesse~

Playing with Restraints

Using restraints is a method of bondage. Sexual beings have a natural curiosity and fascination towards bondage and the sensations that it arouses. It is a wonderful way for people to explore their sensuality as well as their physical responses to stimulation. The openness of our society towards sexual exploration makes it all the easier to experiment with what's out there.
There's something entirely sultry and exciting about handing over control to your partner. It's a sense of playfulness, teasing really; what's more, the combination of pleasure and pain can be so enthralling and exciting. The submissive submits, and for that vulnerability and trust that they offer, the 'dom' gets to be truly in charge of the sensations that the 'sub' gets to experience. There's a sense of anticipation and eagerness that is arousing for all participants. Restraints can absolutely heighten sexual response; even just seeing someone restrained can be erotic.
What actually qualifies as a restraint? It could be as simple as your sexual partner holding your arms down - or something more, perhaps being tied up, handcuffed or hogtied. Getting tied up with rope seems to be the popular medium in porn movies, but holding down your partner with your own body weight is the easiest and most often re-occurring restraint activity.
Some other items that can be used as restraints include scarves, ankle cuffs, Velcro straps and masks with ball gags - as well as full body harness systems that can deepen penetration.
How about some beginner's tips? Getting into bondage requires that you be a bit choosier with your partner. Not only should you be worried about being the one tied up, consider the implications of tying someone else up and having them freak-out during the session. Make sure you trust them because you don't want to be restrained to the point that they can snap all the compromising pictures and videos they want of you: is that the way you want to make your debut on the internet? Therefore, be careful about using restraints with people you don’t know very well. Also, make an agreement with your partner about how far you want to go before you start - and consider the use of safe signals and stop words if one of you has had enough. Start experimenting with things like blindfolding or restraining your bodies with different items.
Especially high on the priority list should be getting some varieties that allow you to easily break out of them. Once you get comfortable with these items, you can allow yourself to focus on the fantasizing - then you can really branch out.
For a more intermediate user, try out some props like your bed posts or bed frame - or even better, take it out of the bedroom altogether. Harnesses and swings are also great ideas. There are inexpensive harness systems that can really add some flavor, while swings are a really fun way to spice up your sex life and add some variety. Why not get dressed up? Bring out your leather, lingerie and boots; it all adds to the sexiness of the occasion.
For the advanced sexual pioneer, we suggest getting creative with ropes, masks or gags. Pick up a climbing or sailing book to get some tips on rope techniques. See if you can do a Full Body Tie Job, a Hogtie, or tie your partner to a chair. Try to do this as safely as you can and make sure you have something to cut it off with if you mess up on your knots.
Using restraints involves creativity, role playing and a variety of props: most of all, it can make the sex - oh - so much more fun. Everyone likes a different degree of bondage and fantasy, so make sure you don't go beyond your partner's boundaries. That can create awkward and uncomfortable feelings and could even eliminate your sexual potential altogether, so be patient!

Kisses,

Jesse~

Cock Rings

Erection rings are another toy that is well known to most. They follow the basic idea of the penis pump; blood in the penis is good. This toy helps to keep most of the blood flowing to his organ in it. It is easiest to put on an already erect penis and can be worn at the base of his shaft or include his scrotum as well. In order to determine the size of the erection ring, measure around the scrotum and penis or just around the shaft. You shouldn’t get a ring that is any smaller than this diameter. If you are unsure of the size needed, then go for an adjustable ring or one that is made of a more flexible material such as jelly.
The cock rings listed here are some of the most popular ones for comfort, feel, and looks. Single strap rings are a single strap (usually leather) that fasten around the penis and scrotum and are adjustable and easy to remove. A perfect starter for the beginner!
The solid ring is the one more stereotypically seen in sexually motivated movies. Made of plastic or metal, and are applied before an erection is achieved. They can be a little trickier to get on as they have no flex to them, and they can only be removed once the erection is lost.
The testicle spreader does just what its name implies; it spreads the testicles through the attachment of straps around each testicle. The straps then click onto the ring. Another similar ring is the testicle stretcher which elongates the scrotum and can be attached to a leash or small weights for extra pleasure or a bit of role playing. Ball stretchers will actually cause your fellows testicles to hang lower if used over a prolonged period.
Finally, the last and favorite of many is the vibrating ring. This one is a great toy for him and her all around. It is the same as the single strap erection ring but made from a firm jelly, and comes with a vibrating bullet that can be placed the tip of the penis, on the clitoris or at the base of the scrotum for added pleasure. No matter what type of ring you choose, it is important to remove the ring every 20 – 30 minutes to allow the blood to circulate through the penis so that the erectile tissues receive enough oxygen to remain healthy. An erection ring shouldn’t be used if you have any type of groin or genital injury. If your guy is on blood thinners, has a clotting disorder, or is diabetic, he should talk to his doctor before playing with erection rings.
The best thing about erection rings is that they can be put on in many tantalizing ways before they even conjure pleasure through their presence. It is easiest to start with a simple ring. You can put it on with your hands or your mouth. This does take some practice, but usually as long as you give him some pleasure in between trying, he won’t mind all of the extra attention. Hold the ring in your mouth between your lips and your teeth then slide your mouth down over his penis and use your tongue to help roll the ring onto his penis. Unless you have abnormally good muscle control in your tongue, it may need to be adjusted at the base with your hands. Once on, enjoy his prolonged erection in any way you want! If you are feeing adventurous, try a ribbed, studded or vibrating ring for some extra stimulation yourself. Whatever you do, have fun, and enjoy.

Kisses,

Jesse~

Sex in Public

What is public sex?

Having sex in public is a very common fantasy and all over the world couples are discretely committing sexual acts in public places. Public sex consists of intercourse or any other sex acts performed in places where others could potentially see the participants. The thrill of taking leave of your senses and gratifying yourself in a spontaneous act of love seems to be happening more and more often now because both men and women often find it a turn-on to think that someone might find them in a "compromising position".

Why do people want to have public sex?

A couple’s lust for one another might simply be too overpowering to wait and they must have one another at that exact moment. Some couples find the heightened adrenaline rush associated with the possibility of being caught greatly increases their arousal and thus they purposely and habitually seek out semi-public places to commit their naughty deed, because a little bit of fear or nervousness can make the scenario of sex outside of the home very exciting and stimulating. Others perhaps engage in sex in public places such as an airplane washroom purely for bragging rights to the infamous "mile high club". Whether the motives for making love in public are lack of private space, urgency, sexual variety, or down right naughtiness, people will continue to do it... so here are a few tips.

Is there anything wrong with public sex?

Couples engaging in sexual acts in public should be aware that most states and provinces have laws against indecent exposure and it is certain that any fantasy will be dampened if there is a serious danger of getting arrested by the police. So if you engage in public sex do so in situations where the chances of actually being caught and/or offending anyone are very low. As well, make sure that if you are in the sight of other people, that they aren’t minors.

What are some exciting places for public sex?

Apartment Roof Top
Balconies
Beaches
Building Elevator
Dressing Rooms
Hiking Trails
Hot Tubs
Library
Lover's Lanes
Parked Cars
Patios
Pools
Public Washrooms

How to know if your partner is ready?

Men are certainly known for their sexual enthusiasm; the promise of thrilling sexual gratification will make most men willing to commit this act despite the consequences. A sexually confident and liberated woman may also be eager to experiment, but the fact of the matter is that public sex is not for everyone, so don’t pressure your partner.
If you are unsure about your partner’s feelings about engaging in public sex, there are several approaches you can take. The first is the PDA test (Public Displays of Affection); your partner’s willingness to participate in public acts like holding hands, kissing, or full fledged making out are often the best indications of whether or not your partner wants to play outside. A second approach to measure her promiscuity is to bring it up directly. Whether it be brought up as a direct question, or undercover through a “what are your fantasies chat”, this approach is never a bad one, as communication is the key to every successful relationship. A third approach would be to go to a nice little spot and just go for it. To succeed with this approach, you are best off taking your partner to a location that is outdoors, but as secluded as the privacy of your own home. For example, take your lover on a hiking trip. Have everything you could need in your back pack, and find a nice little place to take a "rest". Start things nice and slow, especially if you are unsure about whether you partner likes the idea.
For those couples who are naturally adventurous simply putting the moves on your intimate other in a semi-public place might be all the work that's required of you, and hey you'll never know unless you try... If you are in a healthy and sexually adventurous relationship, and are sure you’re partner would be up for the challenge; simply go for it. Make yourself as sexually attractive to your partner as possible; flirt, tease and make them want it as much as you do with prolonged foreplay. Do the things that you know turns them on and make them feel as though you must have them then and there, so it seems completely spontaneous. However don't forget to have protection with you, and almost as importantly, don’t leave the used protection behind!

Final Words of Caution

As fun and exciting as public sex can be, it is not all fun and games. You must be completely responsible about making sure kids aren’t watching as there is no excuse for this! As you dive deeper into this world, remember that the riskier you get, the higher the likelihood of being arrested or fined, or worse yet, having your moment captured for all to see on the net... Exercise caution, play safe, and enjoy!

Kisses,

Jesse~

Unprotected Sex Continues

In spite of all the programs and campaigns to prevent Aids and other Sexually Transmitted Diseases (STDs), many people don’t listen to none of these appellations at all and carry on with a bad sexual behavior, so doing by having sex without condom wearing, ejaculating in the partner’s mouth, vagina or anus and a batch of other unprotected and risky acts that can bring many infections upon the individual.

A person can have many bad influences that teach how to follow this wrong sexual behavior. Many erotic and pornographic movies, for example, say proudly that none of their professional actors use condoms during sexual intercourse. To aggravate the situation, these films, too often, finish a scene with the man cumming on the women’s face and mouth. Then the woman, inevitably, swallows all the sperm, which can contain viruses’ strains of some such incurable STDs.

The oral sex practice without protection is, unfortunately, something common between normal people. Even if they use a condom for other types of sex, a great number of individuals forget it in the time of the oral sex. They think that the sicknesses can’t affect them by cunnilingus or blow job. The STDs really are more dangerous for anal sex, but it doesn’t mean that contacting saliva with sexual fluids won’t infect a person. There isn’t enough grounds on which prove the transmission of HIV through oral sex, although other diseases can affect people by such practice, namely gonorrhea of the throat.

Other practice, most known as ATM – Ass to Mouth or rimming – is very complicated. Many people do it without a condom, or use the same condom for the anus and the mouth. It can cause many infections, due to the high presence of microbes in the anal region, which can be passed to the mouth or to the vagina – if the penetration after anal sex is done there. For these reasons, people need obligatorily to use condoms and use a new one after the anal sex. To increase the oral sex, they can use flavored condoms. A conscious sexual act can save many lives.

Kisses,

Jesse~

Role Playing

Like telling a police officer where he can put that ticket, or telling your university professor what you think of 18th century legal history, there is an inherent satisfaction in saying what you think - even when you know social convention prohibits it. For anyone who has had such taboo thoughts, the resulting adrenaline (as the words sit dangerously close to the tip of the tongue) can be delicious.
The expressions of such powerful scenarios derive their intensity from the same taboo social prescriptions as those fantasies wrought of a more sexual nature. The sight of an attractive police officer, nurse or flight attendant can conjure not only forbidden positions of authority, but also forbidden places for sexual activity.
Everyone’s fantasy sexual experience is different, but if there are any similarities, it is that they lie outside of the usual day-to-day sexual range. They inhabit a world where circumstance and situation often conspire to prohibit satisfaction of our most erotic dreams. For most of us, finding ourselves in favor with the gods of chance should not stop us from realizing our most lascivious imaginings. This is where the delicate art of convincing a lover, or partner, to participate in a romp with a cop, schoolgirl, doctor, nurse, football team or any other such scenario, becomes so important to an exciting and fulfilling sexual life.
With that being said, it is worthwhile to keep in mind that any role-play can possess the potential of eroticism; they do not need to have a power dynamic. Many times the place, position or power (known as the three P’s of erotic fantasy) can all be intertwined with the most emphasis placed on one or more of the three. The most important thing to account for is what does your fantasy consist of, where does it need to occur, and what (if any) props are needed. In many ways the understanding of the individual components of one’s fantasy are as integral to its successful realization as any persuasion or props that may be needed.
The following are some hints on how to get your partner to put on put on that hospital uniform and give you an examination. They are only suggestions and the best advice is always approach your potential participant with honesty and respect. Since you probably know their individual temperament better, do go with instinct. The more you discuss what you want, and get to know what your lover wants, the greater chance you have of a great memorable experience.
Communication
Probably the most difficult part of beginning to talk about sexual fantasies with a lover is the exclusion aspect of personal desires. Since fantasies can be intimidating because they require such a high level of trust, so including your partner may be a tricky thing. The key is making them feel part of your imaginings. Start the conversation by discussing each other’s inner most sexual desires and, once comfortable with the topic, start to broach the idea of incorporating them into your sex life.
Keep in mind during this initial stage that the uniqueness of the situation should be reinforced. This is not something that you want to do with any person that you pick up at the bar, but that you feel so comfortable with your lover that this is a way to further your intimacy. By making the situation special you are emphasizing your partner’s importance in the fantasy, helping them feel invested and sexy.
Next, decide on a good time. Timing can ruin even the best ‘laid’ plans. Make sure that you provide enough time for schedules to be cleared and for other commitments to be fulfilled. This means make a stress and worry free space so that you can have your whole mind on the fun, and not stuck thinking of the hard day ahead. Hint: If you work during the week, Friday night is an especially good time because the weekend provides a good buffer.
Especially for the first experimental session, try and tie it into other fun and sexy activities that you tend to do with your partner. Things like dinner, movie, dancing, etc. can serve to link the rest of the evening’s fun with other positive shared experiences. This will make future forays into fantasy sex more accessible.
Engaging it
Ok. So you’ve convinced your sweetheart to put on chaps and spurs, what next? Get the props and space you want to use set up beforehand. Being able to fall into the dream without having to look for the goods, or make the bed, is integral to keeping the mood and authenticity of the situation intact.
Stay in character! This cannot be stressed enough. The most fun is taking the roles seriously and truly making the fantasy come to life. It will also allow whoever is less comfortable to shed the last remaining part of their natural self-consciousness and give into the fantasy.
Laughing at each other, unless it feels safe for everyone and is agreed on earlier, can be a bad idea. People who are already stretching their comfort zones are likely to quickly retreat into self-consciousness. That is not to say "don't have fun". Experts suggest smiles and sexy noises are the best way to indicate how much fun the experience is. Let each other know that this is going well (or badly) through positive feedback, but stay away from outright laughing at first since it is easily misconstrued as mocking.
So, get into it, make it intense and safe, and always agree that it can end the moment someone feels uncomfortable. It is good to know that just because it doesn’t work once, does not mean that you should stop trying. Fantasy is always fun, if done the right way. If at first you don’t succeed try, try again.

Kisses,

Jesse~

Phone Sex

Phone sex is probably one of the more common 'alternative' types of sexual encounter. Both men and women of many different ages have tried it, but many of us get their first taste of it at a young age, often when at a distance from a partner, keeping in touch by phone.
Phone sex is a fairly ‘safe’ style of alternative sexual contact, as there is no physical risk at all, except for what you do to yourself. Phone sex basically amounts to masturbation while talking to someone on the phone. Of course there is a small risk of having your feelings hurt if someone embarrasses you, but this only usually happens with people you don’t know. Most of us perform phone sex with a known partner, so it’s basically risk free.
Some people find phone sex easier than actual sex. One reason for this might be that, for folks who are a little sensitive or self conscious, it allows them to avoid embarrassment. Others like the fantasy element, where they can imagine the erotic details themselves and set up the perfect sexual fantasy. No matter what the reason, there is much you can do when your partner is unseen.
What you can do when you’re having phone sex is limited only to your imagination. Most people appear to feel that the more creative you get, the better the sex. You could be in any room, doing anything. If you have a cordless hands-free phone, your options multiply. One word of caution – avoid the bathtub. We all know electricity and water don’t mix. As with any form of sex, as long as nobody gets hurt and everything is agreed to, anything goes.
What is important from the start when having phone sex with a partner that you’ve known for a while is to learn each others ‘comfort zones’. What are you comfortable with, and what is a little ‘out there’ for you. Discuss it before hand, and get a little idea of what each of you might like or dislike. Knowing this can make all the difference in the quality of your next encounters.
Although most people think of phone sex as being a 'guy thing', especially with the way phone sex ads are set up most of the time, its interesting to find that many women enjoy good phone sex as well.
What is ‘good’ phone sex? It is individual for each person, but the gender difference appears to be that while most men enjoy the sound of a woman getting off, making moaning and other sounds of pleasure, women appear to like the psychological element of fantasy with their phone sex partners. But again, it really is a personal choice.
One big question for many people is "How do I bring it up with my partner?" - especially when they are unsure of whether their partner would be interested. To start with, it should be mentioned as casually as possible. Most people are at least a little nervous about talking about sexual preferences with new partners, or even established ones. It's something to try when the subject of sex is already on the table.
For example, when one partner is going away and someone says ‘I guess we’d better find ways to please ourselves for a while…” you have a great lead in. The important thing is to go into it when the subject of sex is already naturally there. If you don't try to force it, things should flow more naturally.
Of course, you don’t have to wait for your partner to go far away before you try out phone sex! Try it as a new twist for someone close by. Phone sex makes a great early experiment for couples looking into new ideas.
Icebreakers are a big key. Once you get the ball rolling, the rest tends to follow pretty naturally. You might start by gently describing what you want to do to partner. "You know what’s really nice? When a (woman/man)..." Some people use humor – "If you were here, I'd slap you on the ass and say..." or "I’d slap you on the ass and call you my little..." You fill in the blanks with what sounds good to you. Just think of how you can make a gentle sexy comment to test the waters and let things go from there.
With all this talk about phone sex, there ought to be at least a mention of paid phone sex lines. Yes, paid phone sex can be highly erotic. It’s the reason these lines of lines are so popular – a lot of people enjoy them. The biggest advantage here is that you don't have to prepare to talk to someone, or break the ice. You get on the line, and they’re ready to go. This might be an option for people wanting to get the flavor of phone sex without the risk of being turned down. It’s also one way of getting to know if phone sex is 'your kind of thing', and whether phone sex with an established partner is possible and enjoyable for you.
The downside is, of course, the cost. Paid phone sex is expensive. And there is the added disadvantage of the few 'bad apples' that will overcharge and charge for services you didn’t want. You can avoid a lot of this by going with some of the bigger, more established lines. Looking for names of companies that have been around for a while can help you get the most for your money here.
Overall, phone sex can be a great addition to your sexual repertoire, with lots of positives and very few negatives compared to some other types of alternative sex. If you haven’t done so already, give it a try!

Kisses,

Jesse~

Advanced Dirty Talk

Now that you should hopefully have awakened your partner’s libido, it is time to put that final touch on. Oh yes! The feature presentation! These are some basics guidelines to keep in mind. Like deep breaths and sounds, your words should also be in sync with the rhythm you have just created. The inhale breath should almost always be heard by your partner and you should speak in the "sexy voice" on the exhale breath. Enunciate all your words to your best degree.
To begin you should focus on these following questions: Which of my partner’s skills or attributes turn me on? How do they make me feel? How am I feeling right now? Dirty talking is mostly concerned with momentous sayings, so you should try to let your instinct carry you. If you feel that your partner is hot, call it as it is: "you are so hot!" If you feel that their touch makes your genitals quiver, say it: "Your touch makes my cock/pussy quiver." If you feel that you are very hard/wet, state it: "I’m so hard/wet right now."
However, a good rule of thumb is to avoid the word "because." You are not writing an essay question. This will avoid sounding dull and it will also add urgency. In a sense, you may be cramming a long portion of a sentence in an exhaling breath so this forces you to say it very quickly, which emphasizes that urge. For example: "You laying there naked makes my cock/pussy hard/wet because I find you to be so irresistible." You may be feeling this, but this is a bit long. Try separating the fragments with breaths. Long inhale, "You lying there naked," quick inhale “Makes my cock/pussy hard/wet" inhale "You’re irresistible." This style sounds more natural than mechanical, which is the intention of good dirty talk.
Another added bonus of separating the sentence is that it allows you to think on the spot. You can simply state something with out wondering whether it’s long enough, or why you feel that way. State the phrase, breathe, and add to it.
To turn up the dirty talking a bit, you should focus on this question: What do I want to happen to my partner or to me? Do not be intimidated. Think about things like foreplay, oral, anal, the use of toys, different positions, being spanked, etc. The answers to this question can be transformed into very naughty phrases. These are all within you, for only you know what you want. Ok, so you can cheat if you really need to: if you draw a complete blank, watching adult films for inspiration is always a possibility. Nevertheless, you should look deep within yourself and bare all your dirty fantasies. "Long inhale, You just got out of the shower, couple breaths, I just want to fuck you until you can't walk anymore, inhale, Cum/spray all over you, inhale, quivering exhale, inhale, Get you all dirty again."
After letting out some of your wants and desires, you may want to consider adding some more emphasis on certain subjects. One option is to add those initial sounds as previously mentioned. "Uh, inhale, I want to eat out your pussy/suck your dick, inhale, Ah." Repetition is used to emphasize the importance of an action. "Pound me! Long inhale, Come on, quick inhale, Pound me! Inhale, Pound me harder!" You can also use adjectives and adverbs. "My nipples want your soft lips to slowly suck them and then bite them hard."
Using singular adjectives or adverbs can also be a relief from always hearing the combination of an adjective before a noun. Make sure to stress the last syllable in the word to create more of an impact. For example, the word "wet" should be pronounced as "wet-te." "Long inhale, I love it when I/you push my/your cock so far into you/me, inhale, I feel it touching all your/my walls inside, inhale, warm, inhale, wet, inhale, moist, inhale, tight."
To avoid sounding redundant with vocabulary, attempt using metaphors. "I want to feel my/your essence leaking out of me." "I love it when my/your pole reaches the bottom of your/my throat." "For a more aggressive touch, using cursing can be quite thrilling. Compare “You are such a great lay" to "Holy shit! You are such a great fucking lay!" Other examples are "Fucking bang me harder, bitch/bastard," "Fucking smack my God-damned ass," and "Jesus, it just feels so bloody good that I want to fucking cum all over you." Here you are able to speak louder because these phrases tend to be more aggressive.
Role-playing can also be considered a section of dirty talk because even though you may be acting, there is massive dialogue. Role-playing basically concentrates on acting on your or your partner’s fantasies. This tends to be more difficult because you need to fully understand your fantasies by knowing the role of both you and your partner. For example, you need to know if your partner ought to be dumb, wild, shy, mean, etc. An easy angle to start with is the dominant and submissive roles. You choose one of these roles while your partner must choose the opposing role or vice versa. The dominant figure tends to be more aggressive in their wants and desires. They must take charge: command and demand. "I am going to handcuff you to the bed, and you better not squeal." "Spread your legs now!" There are two sides of being submissive: the willing and the refusing. As a willing figure, you may decide to either solely perform the actions or perform with the purpose of liking them.
If you are a refusing figure, you may decide to perform the commands while begging for mercy or perform after intense threats. In a case you are finding that your partner is having difficulty taking on the role of a dominant figure, you can then ask defiant questions. "What are you going to do if I refuse to even kiss you, never mind suck your cock / eat out your pussy?" If the dominant partner is still not responding, then you answer the questions. "Will he/she smack me, or pin me down?" Here the submissive partner is offering material that the dominant partner would hopefully be able to work with. There are many situations where dirty talking can be used in role playing: nurse and her not-so-sick patient, the student begging for a better grade, a master and his slave, Cleopatra seducing Caesar, popular cheerleader with the average guy, etc. Remember that the trick to having a great role-playing session is to act out exactly what you crave as long as it is to a safe degree.
It is absolutely necessary to practice dirty talking with a partner that you are comfortable with. This will allow you to say exactly what you are striving for and in the end satisfy your wants and needs. Everyone has the potential of being a great dirty talker as long as you remember to work with your own instincts and try to be as natural as possible. The techniques and tips here are not etched in stone so feel free to add your personal style to them and to focus on your partner's feedback. Please keep in mind that practice makes perfect and that variety is the spice of life.

Kisses,

Jesse~

Basics on Dirty Talk

You are laying beside your partner, feeling their naked skin caress yours. Their chest rises with every whisper of a breath. You can feel their warm lips against your neck, and all of sudden, the sexually enticing words rush through your body like a jolt of energy. Have you wanted to unleash that wild side of yours through dirty talking, but haven’t found the courage, or don’t even know where to start? Here we have gathered techniques to teach beginners exactly how to do so. There are tips for breathing, body movements, sounds and the actual phrases themselves. The most important thing about talking dirty is how you say it, rather than what you say!
Creating Mood
For some, the first attempt at talking dirty with a partner can seem to be quite awkward. To eliminate some of that initial embarrassment, you should mention both the idea of the experiment to your partner as well as the limit of your desired kinkiness. The latter is created to help avoid a negative reaction from your partner in case you go "buck-wild" too quickly and cross their own personal boundaries. However, this chat should not occur directly before the incident; this could create massive unwanted pressure. Let’s face it – most people do not want be in the bright spot light when beginning to speak dirty.
Creating a sensual mood is an essential basic to letting that naughty side out of you. No, no - - put that Barry White CD down! The aura I have in mind could be considered a little peculiar, for it consists of a rhythm of breaths and body movements, rather than the soft music and candles, as most would expect. Yet you can also use those if you feel it adds to turning you on. This aspect is the most important part of dirty talking, because it is not what you say, but how you say it. You could say the dirtiest thing in the world and yet sound as sexy as an electronic encyclopedia.
Breathing
Stabilizing your respiration is quite significant for it distinguishes the difference between speaking normally, and talking dirty. You should begin by imitating the deep breaths you take in the doctor’s office as he/she listens to your lungs. You have the option of breathing through your nose, mouth or both. If decide to breathe through your mouth, you do not want to form a large “o” shape with your lips. Come on, you are not a pet waiting for a treat from its owner. Instead your mouth should be slightly open, no bigger than the point of your index finger. This seems to produce a more appealing expression...
The speed of the breaths should co-ordinate with the progression occurring from body movements, foreplay or intercourse. If you are about to make sensual love, then the breaths should be slow, and if you are about to imitate a wild rabbit gone mad, then the breaths would obviously be faster.
After accomplishing a stable beat, you should be examining the sound of your respiration. Most importantly, your exhaling should faintly die off. If the exhale breath stays one tone, it could seem abrupt and almost forced. To help you visualize the sound of this breathing technique, picture a roller coaster. As it shimmies up the tracks, you inhale. As it pauses for a mere half a second at the top, so do you. Then as it coasts down the tracks until slowing down for the next hill, you make the initial part of the exhaling breath a little loud and then slowly become quiet. You may want to consider practicing this routine when you are by yourself.
Adding Sounds
Once you feel comfortable with this breathing technique, you can begin to make sounds as you exhale. These sounds should usually be instinctive and relaxed such as "uh," "ah," "oh," or "mmm." Here you are able to comfortably drop your jaw to widen your mouth if wanted. Do not analyze these sounds; there is no need to worry whether you are making a correct sound. If you unsure, a good rule is that you can rarely go wrong with vowels rather than some awkward consonant. For example, perhaps you choose the sound "bah;" you will ultimately sound like one very naughty, moaning sheep.
The trick with these sounds is that you are not being loud; actually you are being quite faint. The desired outcome is for your voice to barely seep out. Technically, this is speech sound articulated by a momentary closing of the glottis in the back of your throat, hence restricting the airflow. In laymen terms, you are making a murmur sound or a loud whisper. This is also commonly known as a “sexy voice.” If you are having difficulty reaching this volume, imagine being backstage at a play. All of a sudden, the main character draws a blank and completely forgets all his lines. It is entirely up to you to whisper the lines loud enough for the actor to hear, but not loud enough for the audience to hear.
Adding Body Movements
To perfect the rhythm, you now want to add body movements. Desirably, the body movements should be in perfect harmony with your respiration; the body movement should begin and end when a breath begins and ends. As you inhale, your chest should ever so slightly rise in an upward and diagonally out motion. Naturally, your shoulders will delicately move backwards and your upper back should arch with this motion.
There are many different techniques for exhaling. You can simply let your chest, shoulders, and upper back return to their original positions. This can resemble a relieving motion. Another option is to add a subtle pelvic thrust. As you inhale, let your lower back arch so your pelvis and buttocks are being pushed outwards. Your abdominal muscles are being elongated. As you exhale, squeeze your buttocks and bring your pelvis forward in a scooping motion, from a side angle, until back to its original position.
To add some difficulty to these movements, try adding an abdominal contraction as you are about to make the scooping motion. A contraction is the tensing of muscles. An abdominal contraction resembles the same motion your abs make if they are about to be unexpectedly punched; your shoulders move a little forward as the abs are pushed against your back. Ultimately, the contraction should make your pelvis finish the scooping motion by delicately going upwards and back down to its original state. From a side view, the path of your pelvis should resemble the digit, "six."
For those looking for even more difficulty, let the quiver of the contraction be heard in the exhale breath. This sound can be quite sexual, for you can tie it to dirty talking concerning ejaculation. Even though all these movements are critical, you do not want to overdo the actions. You aren’t trying to get the attention of a plane. Keep it subtle or you’ll be doomed to the funky chicken dance.
You can also add other smaller body movements to the rhythm such as the arching of your neck, the closing of your eyes, and the clenching of your hand or the biting of your bottom lip.

Kisses,

Jesse~

Usual forms of sexual addiction

While at some time in their lives some people who are not sex addicts may engage in one or more of the behaviors listed below, it only becomes sexual addiction when there is an irresistible need to repeat the behaviors and habits are developed around them. This has the probable consequence of causing other problems in their lives.

• Compulsive masturbation
• Compulsive sex with prostitutes
• Anonymous sex with multiple partners, where sex is the only object and no relationship (not even as an acquaintance) is established with the person.
• Multiple affairs outside a committed relationship, or serial relationships.
• Frequent patronizing of topless bars, modeling studios, sexually oriented tanning salons, adult bookstores or sexual massage establishments.
• Habitual exhibitionism
• Habitual voyeurism
• Inappropriate sexual touching
• Sexual abuse of children
• Rape

Sex and Love Addiction

A distinction has been made between sex addiction and what is referred to as 'sex and love addiction'. The latter has to do with an addictive pattern of establishing love relationships with specific people, where the person and the relationship, as well as sex with the person, are all part of the appeal to the addict. While these same elements are normal in a healthy relationship, sex and love addicts can never find fulfillment and permanence in any of the relationships they begin. They keep seeking satisfaction in another relationship but find it empty, demanding or anxiety-producing instead.
Sex and love addicts may have several relationships with different people taking place at the same time, or they may pass serially from one to the next,- leaving each when the initial "high" wears off. Or they may have a major relationship (such as a marriage) complete with home, children and other signs of permanence, but keep returning periodically to secret relationships with new people.
Sex addiction, by contrast, is usually a preoccupation with sexual arousal and sexual release which often has little to do with who the person is and requires no relationship. On the contrary, to the sex addict what counts is the charge he or she gets from the image, whether it's a stranger spotted in a car or on a street corner, stimulating body parts, an erotic picture, or the addicts own fantasy.

Treatment

A man or woman suffering from sexual addiction has the option of seeking professional help by consulting a psychotherapist or committing himself or herself to a specialized treatment center.
Seeking counseling sessions with a psychotherapist has the advantage of being more discrete and will have less impact on their economic capabilities. However, for a person who is committing serious offenses because of his or her sexual addiction it is advisable that they commit themselves to a specialized center since this will remove them from the environment where they can indulge in such harmful behavior.

Kisses,

Jesse~

Different Forms of Sexual Addiction

Sexual addiction can take many different forms. The addict may be addicted primarily to one behavior, such as sex with a prostitute, but generally uses a variety of sexual behaviors. For example, consider the salesman who might watch the dancers at a topless bar over a business lunch, have sex with a prostitute from an escort service in his hotel room one night while on a business trip, return home and have sex with his wife while fantasizing about the sexual massage he got last month. The list of the forms of sexual addiction would be exhaustive and increases with addicts' need to find new ways of finding sexual thrills.
Another feature of sexual addiction is that it is progressive. That is, the habitual behaviours progressively become more frequent, varied and extreme - with more frequent and extreme consequences. At times when the addiction seems under control, the addict is merely engaging in one of the common traits of the process in which he switches from sexual release to the control of it. The control phase inevitably breaks down over time (whether it is in an hour, week, month, or year) and the addict is back in the behavior again despite his promise to himself or others never to do it again. When the ecstasy of the release is spent, the addict will often feel remorse at his failure and with great resolve will switch back to another period of abstaining from the behavior until his resolve weakens once again. Without help, this is the way the sexually addicted person lives his or her life.
The Internet has become the newest, most rapidly growing form of sexual acting out for many sex addicts. A lot of sex addicts have added computer sex to their repertoire, as it fills a need for ‘more, easier and better’. For the cyber-sex addict, increasing amounts of time are spent surfing, downloading, masturbating, reading information posted on sexual bulletin boards, exchanging sexual information live with others in sexual chat rooms or via computer cameras, or directing their own live sex shows on interactive sites. The Internet just happens to provide many of the things sex addicts seek, but all in one place: isolation, secrecy, fantasy material, endless variety, around-the-clock availability, instant accessibility, a rapid means of returning, and low or no cost.
As one of the characteristics of sexual addiction is that it is progressive, sex addicts on the Internet often experience a rapid progression of their addiction. The new sexual thrills lead to spending huge amounts of time, moving more quickly into more extreme behaviors, taking greater risks, and getting caught more frequently. The sped-up progression of the sex addicts’ problem via the internet can ironically turn into a blessing, since it can move the addict into the consequences phase more quickly causing him or her to get help faster.

Kisses,

Jesse~

Characteristics of Sex Addiction

The sexual behavior is shameful. The addict feels shame about what he or she is doing, or more accurately about what he or she has done, usually immediately after engaging in sex acts that violate some of the person's standards. Or the shame may be denied by calling it normal for ‘a real man’ - or by focusing on others, "She wanted it.” Thus a married man may feel remorse after having sex with his best friend's wife, rationalize that his friend wasn't sexually satisfying her and avoid going to bed with his own wife afterward, all in a vain attempt to deny there is a problem or that he has done anything wrong.
The sexual behavior is secret. The sex addict more and more comes to live a double life – perhaps well known, respected and admired in more visible life, but secretly engaging regularly in sexual acts that might be shocking to those who know and love them. So (for example) a sexually addicted minister could be revered on Sunday morning for preaching on the sinfulness of adultery and fornication, and then engage in those behaviors himself at a modeling studio or adult bookstore on Monday afternoon. Or a man might tell his relationship partner that he is going to visit a friend but goes to a park to cruise for anonymous sex instead.
The sexual behavior is abusive. It violates someone else's choice or exceeds their understanding. For example, a man who manipulates or coerces his date into being sexual with him, or the woman in a partially unbuttoned blouse who bends down toward an unsuspecting male co-worker and "accidentally" exposes her breast, or the man who seeks out crowded shopping malls so he can meander among the throng to ‘cop a feel’. Much worse are adult men and women who manipulate the trust of children, and abuse their power over them by tricking them into performing sexual acts with them. The sex may also be abusive to the sex addict, such as masturbating to the point of physical injury or cutting or pinching oneself for sexual arousal.

Kisses,

Jesse~

Sexual Addiction

Sexual addiction is rapidly becoming recognized as a major social problem with similarities well known to alcohol and drug addiction or compulsive gambling. The sexually addicted individual becomes addicted to the neuro-chemical changes that take place in the body during sexual behavior, much as a drug addict becomes hooked on the effects of ‘shooting’ heroin. This is not to say that the expression of one as a sexual being, an intensely pleasurable life-enhancing experience for the majority of the population, is an inherently addictive reality. Contrary to enjoying sex as a self-affirming source of physical pleasure, the sex addict has learned to rely on sex for comfort from pain, for nurturing or relief from stress; this is comparable to the alcoholic's purposeful use of alcohol.
The beginnings of sexual addiction are usually rooted in adolescence or childhood. For instance, the child often grows up in a chaotic, hostile or neglectful home; or the family may have been very normal otherwise, but the child grows up emotionally starved for love because affection is rarely expressed. The child may turn repeatedly to masturbation to escape the parents' violent arguments, for instance, or to make up for an unconscious lack of attention or affection. Masturbation should be a normal and natural part of childhood, but for the lonely, abused or rejected child it can become a regular sedative to hide the inner pain. Gradually sex becomes a replacement for other things, a convenient act to turn to in times of any kind of need, from escaping boredom to feeling anxious, to being able to go to sleep at night.
Alternately, the child may be introduced to sex in inappropriate ways. Instead of the normal sexual experimentation that often takes place out of curiosity between similar aged children during growing up, some children are subjected to pedophilia (an adult engaging in sexual activity with a child). Or the person introducing the child to sexual experiences may be another child who is five or more years older (i.e. an older cousin, babysitter, etc.), where the sexual experience doesn't feel mutual. In these experiences there often is a combination of natural curiosity, newfound pleasurable feelings and the feelings of fear or shame. The fear and shame may be increased by threats made by the older person to gain the child's cooperation and to prevent the child from telling anyone about it.
A pattern may be established of seeking out similar experiences throughout the person's life where there is a combination of sexual pleasure and fear or shame. When the child grows up he may be turned on by sex in high-risk situations that unconsciously generate fear, or in secretive circumstances that feed on shame.

Kisses,

Jesse~

Advanced Fellatio

Here are some more advanced lessons that are sure to knock his socks off!

Lesson 1

Place your guy flat on his back on your bed, in a well-lit room. Take his penis in your hand and LOOK at it. You will notice a point of juncture where the two ends of this irregular circle come together. If your partner is not circumcised, this will also be the point where the foreskin is attached. This tiny area is likely the most sensitive spot on his entire body.
Spend time caressing the head and those areas immediately surrounding it. Beneath the head of the penis (glans) is the shaft of the penis. Apparently, according to people who study this type of thing, the shaft does not have many nerve endings and does not, therefore, provide a man with any high degree of stimulation when caressed either manually or with your tongue to the exclusion of the glans head itself. You can add a high degree of pleasure for him by paying the right kind of attention to the testicles.
So LOOK at your partner's penis. Study it. Learn its areas of special sensitivity completely and be ready to apply your knowledge to his body with your tongue and with your lips when you bend your loving head over his cock.

Lesson 2

The most important thing to do at the beginning of going down on a man is to learn to gauge his reactions to stimulus. Once this is done, you will be able to finish him on demand, thereby keeping the favor from becoming a chore.
While his erect penis points toward the ceiling, cup his testicles in one hand and gently, using only your tongue, lick softly, but carefully along the entire underside of his erect organ. As you explore along the underbelly you will learn those areas that give him the greatest pleasure when your tongue is touching them.
For most men the most sensitive area will be the point where the ring of the head and the foreskin are attached; or were attached prior to his circumcision. Position yourself so that your tongue is in direct contact with the “split” in the glans head, and simply stimulate that area with any variety of motions; circular, back and forth, side to side.

Lesson 3

Place the head of his penis inside your mouth, but do not tighten your lips around the shaft. With your tongue, begin a circle motion around his head with the tip of your tongue. The head of his penis will slide to different places in your mouth as you continue the circle motion.
The technique is a great transition move between techniques; just make sure to experiment with the whole spectrum of pleasurable pressure, as this is incredibly stimulating just about any way it is performed. You can also incorporate spinning your head in a back and forth motion to add a little extra sprinkle of love.

Lesson 4

Now let’s discuss a technique that is probably the most common in the world; stroking the penis orally. Take his erection in your mouth by sliding your moistened tongue lovingly over the head until your lips close around the shaft, going as far down as you feel comfortable.
Remember the shaft is relatively insensitive to most stimulation, so the majority of the pleasure is coming from the head of his penis coming into contact with your tongue, roof of the mouth, and or the throat. Since keeping it in contact with something at all times can be difficult, a short and gentle stroking motion can provide a significant impact.

Lesson 5

Wouldn’t it be great if there was a little gauge somewhere that can give you some feedback on how you are doing? Good thing it is exists!
When a man is in a relaxed state, his scrotum and testicles hang freely. As the state of arousal increases, the scrotum will tighten, pulling the testicles closer and closer towards his body. This is a natural process geared at preparing the contents of the testicles for mobilization.
Even better news… his state of arousal, represented in part by his scrotum, can be directly affected by manually and orally stimulating his scrotum. Although you definitely do not want to play rough with his testicles, it can be a welcome change of pace if your neck or arms are getting tired.

Lesson 6

An oral ejaculation is not always a welcome event, especially when it’s not being expected. Although it’s not recommended to cut off the flow entirely, the flow can be reduced by applying pressure to his urethra, found along the entire base of his shaft.

Lesson 7

One of the first problems encountered when learning to perform fellatio was a gag reflex, especially when dealing with men who seem to always want to force their penis as far as they can get it in. (Especially at the moment when they cum!)
According to the statistics, the awkwardness of this situation is confirmed by considering that the average length of your oral cavity is three to three and a half inches while the average penis, in North America, is approximately five and a half inches.
As difficult as it may sound, many have overcome the gag reflex and can take most if not all of their partner into the land of deep-throating. Getting over this hump simply takes practice, ideally on an object that isn’t attached to something that has the tendency to push deeper when you want to abort...
If your partner doesn’t fall victim to the urge to palm your head like a basketball, live training can work... but if all else fails, a popsicle can be a good starter. Just remember to give yourself time to overcome the reflex, rushing this skill will only lead to uncomfortable situations.

In Closing

If you follow these instructions we imagine that you will have the guy in your life eating out of the palm of your hand, or at least eating out of something...
Be safe, and equally important, ENJOY, because that is the most important part.
Try some - or why not all - of the above techniques and neither of you will regret it.

Kisses,

Jesse~

Fellatio Basics

Fellatio is oral sex performed on a man. It is a great way to give pleasure; regardless of whether it is for foreplay, after play, or the main event. Like all other sexual skills, they must be learned, so communication is highly recommended. Whether the communication is before, during, or after, it is essential to learn the art. Finding out what he likes will invariably go a long way towards performing mind-blowing oral sex.
Before reading further, you may want to get acquainted with this region of his body by reading the His Erogenous Zones section and having a look at the Male Diagram.
Keep in mind, when you are performing oral sex, you are doing this for him. Sending negative vibes about not wanting to or how much of a chore it is will take away from his experience. If you act enthusiastic, chances are it will be over faster, and it will be your turn to receive. If you are really against performing fellatio, explain to your partner why you don’t, and don’t allow him to force you if you are uncomfortable.
Cleanliness is essential with virtually all forms of sexual play; particularly in oral sex where a bad taste or smell will undoubtedly dampen enthusiasm on the part of the giver. A bath or shower is a great primer, and can be the start of the festivities. If you are uncomfortable with a particular smell that your partner may have, suggest taking a shower with you, because you’ve had a busy day and don’t feel clean. You don’t want to point out the smell (unless it is a very common occurrence and can be prevented), as that will only lead to anxieties and take away from the overall experience.

Positioning

Finding an agreeable position for fellatio is usually not a difficult task. Both the man receiving fellatio and the person performing it need to be comfortable. For deep throating, it is wiser to choose a position where the angle of the penis and the angle of your throat are somewhat aligned. For a better look at positions for oral sex, have a look in our sexual position section.

The Basics

Too often oral sex is initiated by sucking on the penis. To achieve a more powerful orgasm, it is better practice to start with some teasing. With the exception of a quickie, fellatio should be started with some well placed teasing. Start by kissing and licking around his penis, on the inner thighs, then on to his testicles, and then slowly up his shaft towards his glans (the head of his penis). Once you get there, use your tongue to tickle him around the glans, and especially on his frenulum, the split on the underside of his penis. At this point, he should be hard as a rock and super-sensitive to everything that you do. You can continue teasing if you like, but we don’t recommend teasing too long, as this can become frustrating for the receiver.
One common problem women performing fellatio make is using only their mouth to repeatedly stroke his penis. They continue doing this until either it works, or they get a sore jaw and neck. A good “blow job” should not be too repetitive, should include stroking using a hand and the exploration of his testicles, thighs and (if you and he like) the anal region. By mixing up your style, you allow your muscles to relax, you can avoid getting a sore neck and you can improve your performance.
How you mix it up should depend on what your partner’s likes. Although there is a lot to say about fellatio that can get the job done in a matter of minutes, it is the longer ones that usually result in more intense orgasms, and coincidently are remembered.

It is a good idea to keep an eye on his scrotum (his testicle “sack”), as it is usually a good indicator of how close he is to coming. As a guy gets closer to climax, the skin on his scrotum tightens and pulls his testicles towards his body to warm them up. You can let this happen on its own, or help out by stimulating his testicles with a hand, tongue, or mouth.

More Advanced

Once you get the basics, and are comfortable and experienced with them, there are a lot of options to increase the pleasure. One option is using lubricants on his shaft. This will allow you to stroke faster without causing irritation. There are a wide variety of products that can be used,this includes: flavored lubricants, lubricants that heat up when blown on or rubbed, water based, oil based and many others. On this note, using whipped cream, spreads, and other food can also be incorporated to make the “blow job” more erotic.
Sex Toys can add more stimulation. Whether it is a regular vibrator, a vibrating cock ring, or an oral simulator, these toys can greatly intensify the stimulation. These days, there is virtually a sex toy for everything and everyone, so check out our toy store to find a product that is perfect for you.
If your man likes to experiment, we recommend stimulating his prostate gland with your finger or an anal toy to take his orgasms to a whole new world of pleasure. For more information on this, please refer to the anal play article.
Another more difficult to master skill is deep throating. In this, the performer takes the entire penis into the mouth and down the throat - hence the name. In many cases, the sensation is so intense that climax in men comes quickly. As enjoyable as this may be, it takes time to learn to control your gag reflex. You can train your gag reflex by trying to take as much of the penis as you can when performing fellatio. Your partner should restrain from any thrusting during this exercise! With time, you will be able to go deeper and deeper, until finally you’ll be able to take the whole thing.

Ejaculation

Most men find it very erotic to have a partner swallow their semen, but if you really don’t feel comfortable with it, don’t do it. Options include: catching it in your mouth, then spitting it out; using a tissue to catch it; or, just letting it shoot and clean up the mess afterwards. To find out more about semen, we suggest reading our article on Male Orgasm & Ejaculation.
Many women stop performing fellatio right after their man ejaculates. Instead, you should continue to gently stimulate orally or with your hand for a minute or two longer. After a climax, the penis becomes much more sensitive, so try giving it to him a little longer. Be careful though, some men find this after-play too intense to handle.

Warnings and Suggestions

Very few men like the feeling of teeth on their penis. Teeth can cause discomfort, cuts, and scratches to the skin if you are not careful. This is easily avoided by tucking your lips around your teeth before you take the penis in your mouth.
The use of condoms is highly recommended in the practice of safer sex. If you are not sure of your partner’s sexual history, it is strongly advised that you use a condom while performing any sexual act. If you want something a little more interesting try using a flavored condom and by all means stay away from the lubricated variety (the lubricants used on condoms taste horrible). A good suggestion for anyone using a condom during fellatio is to buy a flavored lubricant to turn a normal latex condom into a tasty condom. The normal rubbery taste of a regular condom can be all but eliminated by unrolling, washing (with mild soap and water), rinsing, drying and re-rolling (if for later use).

Kisses,

Jesse~

Sexual Enhancement

Due to their sexual lingered outward, is granted names for certain herbal varieties that report of likeable aphrodisiac wise framework. The name orchid (from Greek - Orchis, testicle) for instance, stems from the fact that these plants impart dual bulbous root (or else, bulge), similarly to the sac that lodges the male testicles. So what’s the fuss about sexual enhancement by the greenery? In light of the likelihood, the Greek doctor Dioscorides, who lived in 1A.D. looked into the pharmacological properties of roughly six hundred or so species, claimed that the orchid roots would bear aphrodisiac capability. In his piece- about medicine wise- he urged – if man eaten its prime tuber, his offspring would bear male sexual traits`, whereas the small one if swallowed by the women, would prompt them for bearing children of female sexual traits`. Another highly prestigious herbal sexual-aid that stemmed from the imaginary latched onto contour is ginseng. A species of this botanical genre to single out is the Panax schinseng originally from the Far East. It comes to show that the belief of the imaginary within shapes is not a thing of the western only. With forked roots granted itself humanly figure of the male lower limbs`. As it so happens, meaning precisely that in Chinese- male figure. Taken in or applied on the sexual parts under the paste-state the ginseng stands for the eastern medicine as the staple commodity ever since. About the eighteenth century, in the French-Canadian- province of Québec another ginseng species was unraveled the Panax quinquefolium. This plant also wields human look like roots. Conversely, huge amounts of this species got headway into the Far East. Roughly around the nineteenth century, The Us alone exported up to two hundred tons of its roots annually, primarily to China. An exquisite aspect of it is the findings by some Canadian clergy. They stumbled on the name given by the Iroquois, an Amerindian tribe settled down by the borders of Erie and Ontario lakes, which meant- the sprawled thighs of man. In spite of the fact that other Native Americans would have thrived on and sworn by its medicinal properties, receives huge support. The Cherokees, who dwelled in the region known today as the North Caroline, would employ some concoction of it as medicine against belly pangs and cramps. There’s no evidence however as to whether the Native Americans resorted on ginseng as sexual-aid really. One thing is certain this plant enjoys the crisp of the crust as far as sexual-aid goes, be it the east or the west by and large. Tales on sexual powers by the plants are countless. Often their outline would carry out some fanciful sexiness about so-properties. Never mind, there’d be accounts on positive outcomes from its ingestion. In this case, the yielded sexual boost by the goodies within it tampered the bloodstream, on top of becoming output source.

Kisses,

Jesse~

Advanced Cunnilingus

Try all of these in one session and she might not come back down from the heavens until the morning:

The Lick
Leaving your tongue soft and jaw relaxed, try licking her from vaginal entrance up to her clit and following the outer edges of her vagina along both sides. Repeating this technique going up and down and vice versa can be a great opener.
Labial Hold
While holding the two parts together with your lips, run your tongue between the inner and outer labia one side at a time.
Tongue Intercourse
The majority of a woman’s nerve endings in her vagina are around the opening and within the first couple of inches inside. Target them with your tongue by inserting it into her vaginal opening. Techniques are pretty limited due to the length of your tongue, but try moving your tongue in and out, as well as in circles around the inside of her opening.
The Flick
Spread her outer vaginal lips with your fingers. With your tongue pointed, gently flick your tongue around her clitoris. Feel free to roam, but keep coming back to her clitoris, as it is the most sensitive. This drives some women wild, and others find it to too intense. When stimulating her clit make sure to start out gently if you aren’t sure how she likes it. When you try this, pay attention to whether those moans are ecstasy or pain.
The following techniques should not be introduced until your partner is really hot (i.e., very wet). These are more intense techniques, and may be too intense for some women, even when nearing orgasm.
The Clitoris Suck
Expose her clitoris by spreading her lips and lightly pull back her hood. With her clitoris exposed, give it a quick little suck; pulling it into your mouth briefly and letting it go. This is a lot like licking a bit of cake batter off of your pinky. This feels incredible, and is a fine thing to do if you feel like tormenting her – but don’t overdo it! We recommend not using your teeth nor using heavy suction when starting out.
The Clitoris Hold
Take her exposed clit into your mouth and gently suck on it, simultaneously flicking your tongue over and around it. This can be done very lightly or very aggressively, and combined with fingering, will usually rapidly produce an intense orgasm.
The Tongue Tube
Roll your tongue into a tube (if you cannot do this, forget about it because it is genetic and you can't learn it). This technique works best in an inverted or 69 position. Roll your tongue into a tube around her clitoris. Slide it back-and-forth; in effect, your tongue is doing something similar to a woman's vagina around a man's penis. This is likely to bring any woman over the edge to an explosive orgasm.
ABC’s
Try using your tongue to spell the alphabet on her genitals. This works surprisingly well as your tongue is always moving in different directions. Learn her favorite letters and the orders that work the best!
Other Tips
A good lover’s hands never stop moving, so keep exploring, insert a finger, or massage her thighs while you perform.
You can also try using a wide variety of flavored gels, oils, and lubricants. Some of these products heat up when rubbed or blown to add extra stimulation.
Having a mint in your mouth while you are performing cunnilingus can also improve your results. The mint, as long as it is not too weak or strong, can create a very intense tingling sensation to enhance your performance.

Try some - or why not all - of the above techniques and neither of you will regret it. Techniques like this are sure to help her achieve that (sometimes) elusive Orgasm!

Kisses,

Jesse~

Cunnilingus

Performing cunnilingus can be one of the most wonderful things you can do for a woman. It makes her feel loved, admired, sexy, and has the potential to give her an exceptional Orgasm. Many women prefer it to intercourse, and for those who require a large amount of clitoral stimulation, it is the easiest way to orgasm. Besides, lots of women expect it these days and men who perform great cunnilingus are always appreciated and considered fabulous lovers.
There is little more exciting to a woman than to know that her partner finds her delicious; meaning that you enjoy the taste, smell and feeling of her vaginal juices. At the same time, there is little less exciting to a woman than to think that you don’t like the taste and smell of her most intimate region. The smell of a woman is normally fairly mild and pleasant, being quite arousing to the partner. The type and degree of smell can vary considerably from one woman to another and at different times it may be stronger (e.g. closer to her period).
If your partner has a smell that is more than you can handle, or she doesn’t feel comfortable with you down there (thinking you won’t like the smell), suggest taking a nice hot shower or bath together. See the Bathing and Showering section for more details on how to make that bathroom experience a whole lot of fun for the both of you.
Before reading further, you may want to get acquainted with this region of her body by reading the Her Erogenous Zones section and having a look at the Female Diagram.
Remember, there is almost nothing you can do that will feel bad (so long as you are gentle), so relax! Any licking and sucking of the labia, vaginal entrance, clitoris, or anal area should feel great to your partner. Also, once you find something that works, don’t stray too far away from it unless you are moving to something that works better, or if you are teasing.
Exercises
To be able to perform for extended periods of time, there are a number of exercises that can be used to strengthen the muscles in your mouth. Here are a few tongue exercises and positions for performing cunnilingus:
Exercise 1:
Stick your tongue as far out of your mouth as possible, and then try to touch your nose. Once you are in this position, hold the same muscle groups still and begin moving your tongue around. Practice in sets, moving the tongue clockwise, counterclockwise, and up and down.
Exercise 2:
With a loose jaw, point your tongue while simultaneously trying to keep your tongue in constant contact with the top and bottom your mouth. Once you are in this position, practice moving your tongue in and out of your mouth. For the more advanced student, try keeping your mouth closed and circling your tongue around inside of it, while of course, maintaining position. An extension to the advanced exercise is trying to dissolve a lifesaver held in your teeth from the inside out.
Exercise 3:
Stick your tongue straight out of your mouth, trying to keep your tongue flat and relaxed. Slowly, while holding the position, practice curling the wide tip of the tongue upward, downward and side-to-side. Practice in five sets of ten, holding each move for 2 seconds.
Exercise 4:
Keep your tongue relaxed and open your mouth. Move your tongue in and out of your mouth forwards and in both directions. Practice in five sets of twenty.

Kisses,

Jesse~

Analingus

A small word of warning ... before you start poking around their backside, make sure that your partner is ok with it. Some people are not, and won’t react gently when they feel an "intruder”". Some men will be uncomfortable with the idea initially, because of taboos of supposed homosexual behavior. Let us put your mind at rest; anal play is thoroughly enjoyed by heterosexuals as well.
If you want to try analingus, but your partner doesn’t, don’t try to force them! You have a much better chance that they will try it if you have their cooperation, rather than arguing with you. Bring the topic up gently on occasion, and help them open up to this experience by getting them comfortable in the area and with the idea.
Cleanliness is essential with virtually all forms of this type of play. Before engaging in Analingus, make sure to thoroughly wash the area. A bath or a shower is a great primer, and can be the start of the festivities. Once clean, licking this area of the body is virtually no different than licking any other, and can be very stimulating for both you and your partner.
Without going too close to their anus, explore their inner thighs and bottom with your hands and mouth. Some people (especially women) have had bad experiences with anal play in their history, mostly because their partner moved much faster, or less gently, than they should have. If this is true in your case, getting them to talk about the topic is a great way to start. By learning where they went wrong, you can prevent that experience from happening again.
A great way to start performing analingus is to move into it after the giver performs fellatio / cunnilingus. The area is really sensitive, so run the tongue around in circular motions, use the tongue to tickle, and when you are both ready for it, even to penetrate.
Access to the anus is a little tougher than to a vagina, but there are several positions that are ideal: laying the receiver on their back with a large pillow to arch their bottom up; the receiver sitting on the giver's face; the receiver bent over with legs spread; the receiver laying on their back pulling their legs back, and the receiver upside down with their legs spread.
Once any part of the giver has been inside the receiver's anus, it should not be put in anywhere else until cleansed. For Analingus a mouthwash/ teethbrushing should suffice. Carelessness in this regard can cause a very serious infection.
There are many nerve-endings around the anus that can make this form of sex-play an absolute blast for both men and women... turn-off the taboos and get totally turned-on!

Kisses,

Jesse~

Sex with Co-Workers

I have heard some of the best sex-related stories from people who were having sex with their co-workers... the operative word being best, best as a third party observer. For those thinking about crossing the co-worker line, here are some things you should definitely keep in mind... as there really is no going back...
Why do sparks fly so much easier with co-workers? Well, it’s really quite simple... You spend the majority of your waking life at work, where you joke around and provoke each other, you likely share the same frustrations about your environment and bosses, and you are in a similar line of work, so you most likely have other interests in common. If that wasn’t enough, when you start building a more intimate relationship with a co-worker, it makes you want to go to work, it makes the day go by faster - and most importantly, the hormones kick in for a nice dose of euphoria.
Since this is better than the usual day on the job, the tension builds until one day you make plans to hang out, or you run into each other while out on the town. Now outside of the work environment, the flirting escalates… and you end up in bed for one passionate ride...
We interrupt this beautiful love story for disaster scenario number one... the sex is so bad that you never want to even think of it again... too bad that you stand right next to the person for nearly half of your awake life! (It's a risk you need to make sure you are willing to take, so consider having a backup job in mind before following through!)
Assuming this was not the case, in fact, let's assume the sex was some of the best you've ever had... Work becomes more exciting as you spend more time during the day making eyes at each other, flirting, and maybe even kicking it up a notch with a quick blowjob or a full quickie in the bathroom during coffee breaks. This may sound a little extreme, but the temptation to do "bad things" is just so irresistible when you spend the whole day fantasizing about your new partner, especially all the different places you can get away with having sex at work. Long story short, life is good...
As the good times start to roll, you feel like you are on top of the world... like nothing can bring you down. Then, reality shows its ugly head in disaster scenario number two... you lose your job over it... here are just a few ways it can happen:
You get so distracted by the new affair that the quality and quantity of your work starts to drop, and your bosses are getting ready to cut you lose. You try as hard as you can to focus, but all you can do is think about new ways to utilize the break room table...
Slightly worse, you get caught in the act trying some of those ideas you've been fantasizing about for the break room table... or even something more innocent like a little pat on the butt as you walk by each other...
Gossip... obviously this is something that you could handle if you’re tactful, but nasty rumours and politics can give you a reputation that you don't want - especially if someone is jealous. Even if it's not negative, just having to deal with the spotlight until something new and shiny comes along, may be enough to make you want to run full speed away...
Last, but not least, what happens if, more likely when, things get ugly between the two of you? Is it worth hating going to work because you are reminded of the person you can't stand, or can’t have?
Either way, it can leave you in a very negative position that most of us would prefer to avoid at all costs... so make sure that you don't get involved in something you may regret. The rewards can be incredible, but they come with a potentially high price; choose wisely!

Kisses,

Jesse~