Beginner Fetish Toys

Fetish isn’t just for freaks anymore; sex toys and other kink have gone entirely mainstream. You see it in the movies, on television and can even buy bondage gear at the local mall. Kinky sex has finally become acceptable -- this is your big chance to have a little extra fun in the bedroom. Nervous? Don’t be. BDSM (Bondage and discipline, Domination and submission and Sadism and masochism) ranges from mild to wild, and you can set your own pace for exploration.We’re going to look at the lighter side of fetish, the side most women will be receptive to thanks to its frequent exposure in the media. Start your journey here -- you may be surprised where it takes you. Here are some great beginner fetish toys:

Silk scarves

Many women fantasize about being tied up -- or tied down. Want to find out if yours is among them? Bring a handful of silk scarves to bed and hide them away under a pillow. Tease her body until she’s begging you to have your wicked way with her. When she’s reached the point of no return, grab one of the scarves and slide it over her body. Lean in closely and tell her you’re going to tie her wrists together; if she moans, you probably have a real bondage baby on your hands. If she reacts with fear, slow down; this might not be her bag. You can always try again at a later date.Tip: If this is her first time, don’t tie her to an inanimate object. Instead, tie her wrists together -- this will turn her on while still allowing her to feel like she could escape if she wanted to. You want her to feel restrained, not cemented.
Candle wax

This may sound painful, but it’s an exceptionally erotic sensation. Set a candle on the bedside table and make sure it’s in reach. Drive her wild with the foreplay she loves -- kissing, nibbling, etc. As she writhes beneath you, reach for the candle and let it hover above her thigh. Gently tilt the candle to the side until a single drop falls; testing this fleshier, less sensitive area will let you gauge whether or not she’s going to enjoy wax play. If she loves it, continue at a leisurely pace -- this is not something you want to rush through. Unless she specifically requests it, avoid placing the wax on highly sensitive areas such as her face, nipples, clitoris, etc.Tip: Adult gift shops often sell specialty candles that burn at a lower intensity than your garden variety house candle. If you’re both new to wax play, this is an excellent place to start.
Spanking paddle

Spanking isn’t just for punishment anymore -- it can be a very pleasurable experience. The phrase “hurt so good” definitely comes to mind. Sex shops carry a variety of paddles, but if you’re just starting out, these could really scare a novice. Start with something innocuous; we recommend a ping-pong paddle. The next time things are getting hot and heavy, test the waters by spanking her lightly with your hand. If she doesn’t object, keep going. When it becomes clear that she’s hot for this kind of play, grab the paddle and give her bottom a light smack -- and watch the vixen surface.Tip: Pause between spankings and firmly massage her bottom with your hands. This will add greatly to the mixing of pain and pleasure.

Blindfold

When used properly, a blindfold can magnify arousal by leaps and bounds. While they do sell proper masks for this purpose, they’re not terribly sensual. Your best bet is making use of one of the silk scarves you brought to bed earlier. The appeal of the blindfold is simple enough -- the sound of your voice, the feel of your breath on her skin -- their effects are amplified when sight is restricted. Watch her quiver with anticipation as you discuss what you’re about to do to her; you’ll be amazed by how aroused you both become.Tip: Be careful when securing the blindfold; it’s very easy to inadvertently pull hair when doing this. You don’t want her associating this kind of play with pain.
Cock ring

These have come a long way over the years, and they can really spice up a sexy evening. Who doesn’t want a larger penis with a never-ending erection? You can choose from a variety of styles, colors and materials. If traditional steel sounds a bit unpleasant, you can always opt for something soft and pliable. Cock rings aren’t just for men, either -- try a vibrating ring on for size. These will double her pleasure by stimulating the clitoris during sex.Tip: Most cock rings are not one size fits all; measure yourself before purchasing. If you experience pain, tingling or numbness, remove immediately and buy a larger one.

Be safe, sane and consensual

Fetish play can make for a very rewarding sex life, but it’s crucial that boundaries be respected at all times. If your woman is apprehensive, take the time to discuss her concerns and be willing to slow down. As trust builds, she’ll be willing to delegate more control, and that’s really what responsible fetish play is all about. Make her feel safe with these beginner fetish toys and she’ll happily follow your lead.

Kisses,

Jesse~